GRAY MATTER EDITS

The Writer’s Spellbook

Fiction Copyediting

EXPLORE THE MANUSCRIPT SAMPLES

PUBLIC-DOMAIN SOURCE · EDITED PORTFOLIO EXCERPT

Editorial Brief · Independent Demonstration

Copyedit this extract in British English, applying modern grammar, punctuation and mechanical conventions while retaining the deliberately archaic fantasy register and Hyne’s distinctive diction wherever the meaning remains clear.

This brief was devised by Gray Matter Edits for a public-domain portfolio demonstration. It was not supplied or approved by the original author.

Fantasy · Copyediting sample01

The Lost Continent

My escort made outcry with the horn which hung from the wall, inviting such a summons, and a warder came to an arrow-slit, and made an did inspection of our persons and business. His survey was according to the ancient form of words, which is long, and this was made still more tedious by the noise from within, which ever and again drowned all speech between us entirely.

But at last the formalities had been duly complied with, and he shot back the massive bars and bolts of stone, and threw ajar one monstrous stone valve of the door. Into the chamber within--—a chamber made from the thickness of the wall between the two doors--—I and my fellows crowded, and then the warder with his machines pulled to the valve which had been opened, and came to me again through the press of my escort, bowing low to the ground.

“I have no vail to give you,” I said abruptly. “Get on with your duty. Open me that other door.”

“With respect, my lord, it would be better that I should first announce my lord’s presence. There is a baiting going forward in the circus, and the tigers are as yet mere savages, and no respecters of persons.”

“The tigers, if my lord will permit them the name. They are baiting a batch of prisoners with the two great beasts which the Empress (whose name be adored) has sent here to aid us keep the gate. But if my lord will, there are the ward rooms leading off this passage, and the galleries which run out from them commanding the circus, and from there my lord can see the sport undisturbed.”

Now, the mere lust for killing excites only disgust in me, but I suspected the orders of the Empress in this matter, and had a curiosity to see her scheme. So I stepped into the warder’s lodge, and on into the galleries which commanded the circus with their arrow-slits. The old builders of the place had intended these for a second line of defence, for, supposing the outer doors all forced, an enemy could be speedily shot down in the circus, without being able to give a blow in return, and so would only march into a death-trap. But as a gazing-place on for a spectacle, they were no less useful.

The circus was brightly lit by the moonlight, and the air which came in to me from it was acrid with the reek of blood. There was no sport in what was going forward: as I said, it was mere killing, and the sight disgusted me. I am no prude about this matter. Give a prisoner his weapons, put him in a pit with beasts of reasonable strength, and let him fight to a finish if you choose, and I can look on there and applaud the strokes. The war prisoner, being a prisoner, has earned death by natural law, and prefers to get his last stroke in hot blood than to be knocked down by the headsman’s axe. And it is any brave man’s luxury either to help or watch a lusty fight. But this baiting in the circus between the gates was no fair battle like that.

To begin with, the beasts were no fair antagonists for single men. In fact, twenty armed men armed might well have fled from them. When the warder said tigers, I supposed he meant the great cats of the woods. But here, in the circus, I saw a pair of the most terrific of all the fur-bearing land beasts:, the great tigers of the caves--—huge monsters, of such ponderous strength that in hunger they will oftentimes drag down a mammoth, if they can find him away from his herd.

How they had been brought captive, I could not tell. Hunter of beasts though I had been for all my days, I take no shame in saying that I always approached the slaying of a cave-tiger with stratagem and infinite caution. To entrap it alive and bring it to a city on a chain was beyond my most daring schemes, and I have been accredited with more new things than one. But here it was, in fact, and I saw in these captive beasts a new certificate for Phorenice’s genius.

The purpose of these two cave-tigers was plain: whilst they were in the circus, and loose, no living being could cross from one gate to the other. They were a new and sturdy addition to the defences of the capital. A collar of bronze was round the throat of each, and on the collar was a massive chain which led to the wall, where it could be paiyed out or hauled in by means of a windlass in one of the hidden galleries. Thus, So that at ordinary moments, the two huge beasts could be tethered, one close to either end of the circus, as the litter of bones and other messes showed, leaving free passage-way between the two sets of doors.

But when I stood there by the arrow-slit, looking down into the moonlight of the circus, these chains were slackened (though men stood by the windlass of each), and the great striped brutes were prowling about the circus with the links clanking and chinking in their wake. Lying stark on the pavement were the bodies of some eight men, dead and uneaten; and though the cave-tigers stopped their prowlings now and again to nuzzle these, and beat them about with playful paw-blows, they made no pretence at of commencing a meal. It was clear that this cruel sport had grown common to them, and they knew there were other victims yet to be added to the tally.

MANUSCRIPT STYLE SHEET · FANTASY

Editorial decisions made for this independent portfolio demonstration. Mechanical conventions are modernised while the original narrative register is retained.

Language

British English; modern grammar, punctuation and mechanical conventions.

Narrative register

Retain intelligible archaic and formal constructions and Hyne’s distinctive diction.

Double hyphens

Convert to em dashes.

cave-tiger

Hyphenated.

arrow-slit

Hyphenated; retain the established form.

passageway

Closed compound.

Empress

Capitalise when used as a title.

Phorenice

Confirmed spelling.

whilst

Retain British and authorial usage.

pretence

British spelling.

paid out

Preferred verb in the chain-and-windlass context.

This style sheet records the conventions and consistency decisions applied in this independently prepared copyediting demonstration. It illustrates how Gray Matter Edits preserves an author’s distinctive voice while maintaining editorial consistency.

Source: C. J. Cutcliffe Hyne, The Lost Continent, Chapter VI, “The Biters of the City Walls”. Project Gutenberg eBook #285. This is an independently prepared portfolio demonstration, not a commissioned edit. The original author was not a client of Gray Matter Edits.

Choose a genre, then select a numbered marker or editorial comment to explore the editing decisions.

KEYDeleted textInserted text▣ Editorial commentOriginal text retained
The Fantasy sample is an independently prepared copyedit of public-domain literature. The other three genres currently contain illustrative placeholders.